Tuesday, January 22, 2019

In Search of Non-Toxic Manhood

Research in gender at least as far back as the 80's, where I remember reading about it, would have shown that men who were more mixed in their gender role outlook, having an even mix of feminine and masculine qualities were happier, more likely to be satisfied socially and sexually, and more attractive to women as compared to traditional men. Although the concept has gotten bad press, as when the press described Michael Jackson's non-sexual persona as androgynous, thereby smearing men with balanced sex roles, it is still a better option for men and for women. Little has changed since then, except that traditional male orientation has been found to be in many ways harmful.


Granted, we have a moderately traditional culture so many of the expectation will not go away any time soon, if ever, but the bad impulses can be tamed. We need to create a better variant, something that rejects traditional masculinity but is smart and educated, athletic and fit but not obsessed with strength, attractive to women, having a broad range of interests, etc. One can satisfy the demands of masculinity without engaging in what people typically think of as traditional masculine endeavors, nor does one have to suffer under the typical understanding of stoicism.


A Journey — if You Dare — Into the Minds of Silicon Valley Programmers

My responses in a NY Times comment section for the book, Coders: The Making of a New Tribe and the Remaking of the World by Clive Thompson ...